|
21:10:26 |
Webmama_Tina |
ok so tonite we are so pleased to have
hathor the cow goddess again |
|
21:10:40 |
Webmama_Tina |
hathor, why don't you introduce
yourself! |
|
21:10:58 |
hathor |
Hi I'm Hathor! hee hee. Actually, no, |
|
21:11:04 |
Webmama_Tina |
and mamas throw out those question marks
whenever you're ready and i'll start the
queu |
|
21:11:12 |
Webmama_Tina |
qeue |
|
21:11:18 |
Webmama_Tina |
oh however you spell it, lol |
|
21:11:32 |
hathor |
My name is really Heather and I'm a mild
mannered mama living in the outskirts of
santa monica. |
|
21:12:09 |
hathor |
And I have an affinity for sharpie pens
and a silly need to toon about my
life... |
|
21:12:23 |
hathor |
Of course a lot of it is just plain made
up. |
|
21:12:45 |
hathor |
any questions? |
|
21:12:51 |
vmarchant |
Yes I have one |
|
21:12:58 |
Webmama_Tina |
go for it vmarchant |
|
21:13:00 |
Webmama_Tina |
you're first |
|
21:13:10 |
Webmama_Tina |
anyone else...please post a single
question mark |
|
21:13:14 |
Webmama_Tina |
and i'll take note |
|
21:13:19 |
juneau |
? |
|
21:13:32 |
vanessagreene |
? |
|
21:13:32 |
vmarchant |
So, Was the series I Told You So" made
up or a real conversation" |
|
21:13:37 |
vmarchant |
? |
|
21:13:56 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: juneau,
vanessagreene |
|
21:14:02 |
hathor |
It was a conglomeration of about a ton
of conversations I've had...over and
over again! |
|
21:14:17 |
vmarchant |
? |
|
21:14:34 |
Webmama_Tina |
oh post your link hathor, i'm sure some
of us would like to check out what
you're talking about, LOL |
|
21:14:35 |
hathor |
I try so hard to walk the line between
being a supportive listener and yelling
and screaming at the person |
|
21:14:52 |
hathor |
http://www.thecowgoddess.com |
|
21:15:11 |
hathor |
http://www.thecowgoddess.com/archshow.asp?var=214
|
|
21:15:29 |
vmarchant |
So, do you notice any particular
characteristics shared by all the people
with whom you've had these
conversations ? |
|
21:15:32 |
hathor |
http://www.thecowgoddess.com/archshow.asp?var=215
|
|
21:16:15 |
hathor |
They don't seem to trust themself and
that lack is almost impossible to help
them with... |
|
21:16:37 |
hathor |
And then they don't trust that what
you're saying will actually work for
them |
|
21:17:00 |
juneau |
You often keep me sane--how do you stay
sane when the messages are so constant
and battering from the culture around
us? -- |
|
21:17:09 |
Webmama_Tina |
Welcome to this week's Mothering
Sponsored chat! This is a moderated
chat. Please make sure you read and
fully understand the Moderated Chat
Instructions before participating in
this chat. Instructions can be found
here:
http://www.mommychats.com/modrules.htm
...A Friendly Reminder: Please do not
post unless it is your turn to ask a
question. If you have a question, please
post a single ?" and you'll be added to
the queue. Have your question ready when
your name is called." |
|
21:17:16 |
hathor |
And when it doesn't, they distrust you
even more and suspect you have been
misleading them all along! |
|
21:17:17 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: juneau,
vanessagreene |
|
21:18:02 |
MyBabyandMore |
? |
|
21:18:22 |
hathor |
Hi Juneau, I'm pretty blessed to be in
california where there are a LOT of
mamas parenting this way. I'm one of the
least radical of my group. hee hee |
|
21:18:45 |
milk_maker |
? |
|
21:19:08 |
hathor |
It helps keep me sane, but doesn't
always give me inspiration (for the
comics) |
|
21:19:14 |
radicalmama |
? |
|
21:19:19 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: vanessagreene,
vmarchant, MyBabyandMore, milk_maker |
|
21:19:30 |
vanessagreene |
I know from your info that you had an
unassisted birth....how did you get up
the guts to do that? |
|
21:19:34 |
juneau |
Ah well, I moved to Ohio from So Cal
when I was three months pregnant. Dd is
a year old now and it's hard to always
remember to trust myself when everyone
around is listenting to advertising... |
|
21:19:37 |
hathor |
When I walk up to a parkday and all the
mamas have a baby on their breast... I
think well, that's finished! |
|
21:20:37 |
hathor |
When I moved to NC two years ago, I was
reminded how far we need to go still.
The sling is still a surprise |
|
21:20:53 |
hathor |
and I was uncomfortable nursing in
public sometimes! |
|
21:21:17 |
hathor |
Hi vanessagreene, in the beginning it
was a money issue |
|
21:21:36 |
hathor |
My first homebirth was in Florida and
medicaid paid for a homebirth |
|
21:22:14 |
hathor |
I literally could not afford a midwife
and so that opened me up to the idea,
the consideration of unassisted |
|
21:22:52 |
hathor |
Then I started researching and realized
that was the way I needed to birth...and
it was really perfect |
|
21:23:01 |
vanessagreene |
I can't even convince my husband to have
a home birth! |
|
21:23:39 |
hathor |
husband can be tricky, but it's really
your choice, your health, your body. |
|
21:23:57 |
vanessagreene |
:D |
|
21:24:00 |
hathor |
You have the hormones, the intuition,
it's you that are doing the work |
|
21:24:13 |
Mama_Bear |
hey mamas |
|
21:24:25 |
hathor |
My dh was really worried about the
homebirth with midwife and he asked her
about safety |
|
21:24:47 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: vmarchant,
MyBabyandMore, milk_maker, radicalmama |
|
21:24:51 |
Webmama_Tina |
Welcome to this week's Mothering
Sponsored chat! This is a moderated
chat. Please make sure you read and
fully understand the Moderated Chat
Instructions before participating in
this chat. Instructions can be found
here:
http://www.mommychats.com/modrules.htm
...A Friendly Reminder: Please do not
post unless it is your turn to ask a
question. If you have a question, please
post a single ?" and you'll be added to
the queue. Have your question ready when
your name is called." |
|
21:25:04 |
hathor |
The midwife told him that there isn't
much that can go wrong that you don't
have plenty of time to prepare for |
|
21:25:10 |
vanessagreene |
my next will be a vbac and I really want
to be at home as far away from an
operating room as possible. |
|
21:25:40 |
hathor |
You can see trouble coming and can
transfer, easily. With a vbac that might
be your only option |
|
21:25:41 |
vanessagreene |
i guess i just have to work on
him....thanks hathor |
|
21:26:02 |
hathor |
a lot of hospitals won't even let you
get close to a vbac |
|
21:26:16 |
vanessagreene |
its a bit different up here in canada |
|
21:26:48 |
hathor |
next question? |
|
21:27:21 |
Webmama_Tina |
vanessagreene here's a page of links
that i set up:
http://fresnofamily.com/pgbirth/homebirth/hblinks.htm
|
|
21:27:26 |
vmarchant |
Do you think there's a connection
between American culture's discomfort
with Do Do you think there's a
connection between our culture's
discomfort with public breastfeeding and
the culture's perception of the human
body, particularly women's bodies? |
|
21:27:28 |
vanessagreene |
ty |
|
21:27:35 |
hathor |
http://www.unassistedhomebirth.com/fathers/
|
|
21:27:58 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: MyBabyandMore,
milk_maker, radicalmama |
|
21:28:05 |
hathor |
totally. |
|
21:28:18 |
MyBabyandMore |
am I up? |
|
21:28:24 |
Webmama_Tina |
not yet |
|
21:28:30 |
MyBabyandMore |
k :) |
|
21:28:31 |
Webmama_Tina |
just letting you know the line up. :) |
|
21:28:34 |
hathor |
When I was working as an artist I used
breastmilk in my work alot and it really
freaked people out |
|
21:29:06 |
hathor |
the idea of leaking and seeing and
possibly getting near a lactating mother
is really strange to some people |
|
21:29:26 |
vmarchant |
here in the US, but not elsewhere? |
|
21:29:29 |
hathor |
they should of course be ashamed of
themselves and get a good therapist! |
|
21:29:51 |
Webmama_Tina |
ah here's the book i was looking
for...to share with you vanessagreene
and anyone else that wants it :)
http://www.birthingtheeasyway.tk/
|
|
21:29:58 |
vanessagreene |
ty |
|
21:30:14 |
Webmama_Tina |
:) |
|
21:30:16 |
hathor |
Well, I haven't been everywhere but I've
been a lot of places where they just
breastfeed |
|
21:30:36 |
hathor |
it's just what they do. |
|
21:31:10 |
hathor |
Bali, southern europe...it's funny that
northern europe is similar to us.
uptight |
|
21:31:44 |
hathor |
Next Question MyBabyandMore ? |
|
21:32:07 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: MyBabyandMore,
milk_maker, radicalmama |
|
21:32:25 |
Webmama_Tina |
you're up MyBabyandMore |
|
21:32:39 |
MyBabyandMore |
Hi Heather! You mention the lack of
trust Mamas have in knowing what is best |
|
21:32:46 |
MyBabyandMore |
for them and ther family. |
|
21:33:02 |
MyBabyandMore |
How did youlearn to trust yourself? |
|
21:33:21 |
hathor |
When I had my first baby I had her in
the hospital |
|
21:33:32 |
MyBabyandMore |
And what advice would you give other
Mamas so that they may trust their own
instincts? |
|
21:34:04 |
hathor |
I had a bunch of breastfeeding problems
and my husband (who's boss was married
to a lll leader) told me to call lll |
|
21:34:38 |
hathor |
That was really my turning point. I knew
I wanted to breastfeed but I was cracked
and bleeding and funky and yucky |
|
21:34:50 |
hathor |
and weepy and cryy and all that |
|
21:35:07 |
hathor |
I went to a lll meeting and checked out
the continuum concept. |
|
21:35:34 |
hathor |
started to read...and then remembered a
lot that I had seen in Bali women
carrying their children |
|
21:36:15 |
hathor |
at the time I had seen them as the OTHER
and not considered it, but once I read
TCC I started to sling the baby and life
was so much better |
|
21:36:37 |
hathor |
Then, trust began. My baby taught me. |
|
21:37:20 |
MyBabyandMore |
They teach us so much! |
|
21:37:57 |
hathor |
I was lucky that the balinese had
modeled such good behaviour |
|
21:38:21 |
hathor |
Now, I think it is up to those of us who
get it to model that good behavior for
others |
|
21:38:51 |
hathor |
since they don't usually have a lot of
time to learn to trust their bodies
before the c-section happens |
|
21:39:17 |
hathor |
or the milk dries up. Our window of
opportunity is quite small, |
|
21:39:39 |
hathor |
I happen to think humor is helpful. |
|
21:39:56 |
MyBabyandMore |
I agree |
|
21:40:00 |
hathor |
Next Question Milk_maker? |
|
21:40:06 |
milk_maker |
How can I be a good role model for other
women? I offer my books, try to set a
good example, but I'm afraid I come
across as too pushy. I tend to get a
bit enthusiastic at times. :embarassed: |
|
21:40:11 |
MyBabyandMore |
Thank you for doing what you do! |
|
21:41:06 |
hathor |
Well, that's a tough one! and me too!
Again with that small window of
opportunity new pregnant mamas don't
really understand the ramifications |
|
21:41:34 |
milk_maker |
Gotta get them early then? ;) |
|
21:41:37 |
hathor |
of just following orders, they could end
up with a totally crappy life that they
haven't chosen of planned on! |
|
21:41:58 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: milk_maker,
radicalmama |
|
21:42:13 |
hathor |
I did a speech about it at the NCLLL
conference a few years ago called
Parenting as Performance art |
|
21:42:46 |
hathor |
How we need to attract attention to the
way that we are parenting differently
for the young to see |
|
21:43:27 |
hathor |
I had a young college student tell me
that I have a lot of patience the other
day, which is not really always true |
|
21:44:13 |
hathor |
but I'm glad that I was modeling well
and that he noticed and maybe he'll
remember like my dh and I remembered the
Balinese after we had children. I hope. |
|
21:44:41 |
hathor |
Next Question radicalmama? |
|
21:44:59 |
vanessagreene |
? |
|
21:45:04 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: radicalmama,
Webmama_Tina |
|
21:45:21 |
vmarchant |
? |
|
21:45:36 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: radicalmama,
Webmama_Tina, vanessagreene, vmarchant |
|
21:45:46 |
hathor |
Oh and I think that laying around a
certain cowgoddess' comics could do a
lot for new mamas give 'em something to
laugh about while they're getting an
education |
|
21:45:47 |
Webmama_Tina |
hm radicalmama seems to be gone |
|
21:45:51 |
Webmama_Tina |
guess i'm up! :) |
|
21:46:22 |
Webmama_Tina |
i was just wondering if you would
consider traveling to fresno for our
babyfest this coming may.... would LOVE
to have you! |
|
21:46:27 |
Webmama_Tina |
www.fresnobabyfest.com |
|
21:46:31 |
Webmama_Tina |
20-May |
|
21:46:35 |
hathor |
Plus, friends can think you are normal
compared to Hathor and so open up to
your ideas |
|
21:46:44 |
milk_maker |
lol |
|
21:46:48 |
milk_maker |
thank you |
|
21:46:54 |
hathor |
Hmmmm? Fresno? I have to go get an atlas |
|
21:47:00 |
Webmama_Tina |
LOL |
|
21:47:08 |
Webmama_Tina |
central valley...the armpit of
california |
|
21:47:11 |
Webmama_Tina |
hehe |
|
21:47:25 |
hathor |
I offered to go to a conference in
albuquerque the other day and then found
out it was a 2 day drive! |
|
21:47:32 |
Webmama_Tina |
yikes |
|
21:47:45 |
Webmama_Tina |
this would probably only be like 5 or 6
hours...not sure exactly how long it is
from where you are |
|
21:47:52 |
hathor |
Oh you know what my first baby will have
her b-day that weekend! |
|
21:48:01 |
Webmama_Tina |
oh bummer |
|
21:48:05 |
hathor |
It's the anniversary! |
|
21:48:05 |
Webmama_Tina |
:( |
|
21:48:18 |
Webmama_Tina |
well not a bummer for your kiddo, LOL |
|
21:48:31 |
mollychats |
? |
|
21:48:35 |
hathor |
But I'm so willing to go to things like
that usually, maybe next time? |
|
21:49:02 |
hathor |
Next Question vanessagreen? |
|
21:49:04 |
Webmama_Tina |
well if you have anything in print...we
have a virtual vendor option.... |
|
21:49:10 |
Webmama_Tina |
i'll email you about it. :) |
|
21:49:18 |
vanessagreene |
sorry....be patient...ank |
|
21:49:20 |
vanessagreene |
nak |
|
21:49:28 |
hathor |
cool, my book! did I mention my book |
|
21:49:30 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: vanessagreene,
vmarchant |
|
21:49:39 |
Webmama_Tina |
not this chat yet ;) |
|
21:50:07 |
hathor |
I'm doing the two handed with the baby
falling asleep in my lap, my left hand
is falliung asleep! hee hee |
|
21:50:28 |
vanessagreene |
what advice do you have for future
unschoolers? how and when to
start?...lol nak with a 10 month old is
challenging |
|
21:51:05 |
milk_maker |
? |
|
21:51:09 |
hathor |
I think of unschooling as an unfolding
of the way I parented when the kids were
little |
|
21:51:49 |
hathor |
It's full of loving guidance, and just
being there, beside them everyday and
just doing your thing... |
|
21:52:18 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: vmarchant,
milk_maker |
|
21:52:23 |
hathor |
As a matter of fact the best part of
unschooling is letting go and allowing
your kid to lead the way so that they |
|
21:52:34 |
hathor |
teach you how to unschool them |
|
21:52:49 |
rosalind |
? |
|
21:52:52 |
vanessagreene |
it seems so right....just a little
daunting |
|
21:52:57 |
hathor |
I tried to teach my daughter how to read
before she wanted to YIKES! |
|
21:53:26 |
hathor |
huge arguments every day and then she
went and hid the book I was using, up in
the closet. |
|
21:53:41 |
vanessagreene |
lol |
|
21:54:13 |
hathor |
so I backed off and followed her lead
and now she's reading books this year (8
almost 9) and reading everything |
|
21:54:33 |
hathor |
and so happy and proud and did it all
herself. really cool. |
|
21:54:57 |
vanessagreene |
thats awesome |
|
21:55:02 |
hathor |
It's true! I fight with my kids
sometimes! hee hee |
|
21:55:17 |
hathor |
Next Question vmarchant? |
|
21:55:20 |
vmarchant |
How do you manage to stay sane with
three kids and all that you do? I had
my third baby last Sept and there are
times when I wonder why I agreed to have
a third. Like when the baby and the 2
1/2 year old are both screaming at the
same time.... |
|
21:55:51 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: vmarchant,
milk_maker, rosalind |
|
21:55:52 |
vmarchant |
and dinners cooking on the stove- like
one of your comics |
|
21:56:05 |
hathor |
Man don't I know it? You have to pace
yourself and try to know when there are
days that you're just coping |
|
21:56:34 |
hathor |
and try not to be too hard on yourself
and remember that one day soon that
behavior will stop and voila! |
|
21:56:56 |
hathor |
(a new, probably even worse one will
start hee hee!) |
|
21:57:00 |
vmarchant |
I usually don't realize this until I'm
NOT coping :< |
|
21:57:19 |
Webmama_Tina |
upcoming chatters: milk_maker, rosalind |
|
21:57:25 |
vmarchant |
Oops wrong emoticon |
|
21:57:33 |
Webmama_Tina |
At this time, the queue is full.
Questions already in line will be asked,
but we cannot take anymore today. Sorry
for the inconvenience. |
|
21:57:40 |
hathor |
So true so true. I had a great day with
the kids today and thought man, it's
been a few weeks since we |
|
21:57:47 |
vmarchant |
:/ |
|
21:58:00 |
vmarchant |
:-( |
|
21:58:25 |
hathor |
have been in this good a groove...we're
all there sometimes, dust yourself off
and start the nexxt day anew |
|
21:58:44 |
hathor |
On crappy days I like to remind myself
how resilient kids are! |
|
21:59:01 |
hathor |
Next Question milk-maker? |
|
21:59:04 |
vmarchant |
Thank-you Hathor |
|
21:59:06 |
milk_maker |
Do you ever get so fed up that you just
want to stop caring about how other
people parent their children? |
|
21:59:32 |
hathor |
Yes. |
|
21:59:41 |
milk_maker |
Part of me wonders if the stress is
worth it sometimes |
|
21:59:52 |
hathor |
But then who will date my daughters?
yikes! |
|
21:59:58 |
milk_maker |
lol |
|
22:00:01 |
milk_maker |
true! |
|
22:00:25 |
hathor |
We've got to make the world a better
place and I can't think of a better way
than parenting well |
|
22:01:09 |
hathor |
and if we don't spread the
world...Imagine! C-sections take over
and narural birth disappears from our
culture? |
|
22:01:15 |
milk_maker |
*shudders* |
|
22:01:37 |
hathor |
Michel Odent says that c-section rates
are tied to violence rates |
|
22:01:50 |
milk_maker |
how is that? |
|
22:02:08 |
hathor |
and no breastfeeding, think of the cost
to the environment, the health care
costs! |
|
22:03:23 |
hathor |
Okay, so it's a hard road and there are
aLOT of dense people out there butthere
are a lot of mamas who just haven't
heard of it yet. It's for them that we
have to spread the word! |
|
22:03:28 |
hathor |
it |
|
22:03:42 |
hathor |
is in his new book caesarean |
|
22:03:59 |
milk_maker |
I'll definitely have to check that out.
Thanks! |
|
22:04:04 |
hathor |
Next Question rosalind? |
|
22:04:11 |
rosalind |
Aside from TCC, which books most
influence your thinking? |
|
22:04:55 |
hathor |
Ishmael, adbusters magazine Oh and I
just read Last Child in hte Woods. Man
it's good |
|
22:05:20 |
rosalind |
What is Ishmael? |
|
22:05:38 |
hathor |
I have the farmer and the obstetrician
cued up and Orion magazine sitting to
the side and just finised The Truth with
jokes |
|
22:06:37 |
hathor |
Ishmael! Oh man,
http://www.ishmael.org/welcome.cfm
read it! you'll love it! |
|
22:06:44 |
Truffulatuft |
Hey Hathor! I like the told you so"
series" |
|
22:07:03 |
hathor |
Hey thanks Truffula tuft! |
|
22:07:15 |
Webmama_Tina |
so i think that was the last question? |
|
22:07:35 |
Webmama_Tina |
and we are out of time, for the official
chat, at least... |
|
22:07:45 |
hathor |
was it? |
|
22:07:45 |
Webmama_Tina |
hathor, you are welcome, of course, to
stay as long as you like and chat! |
|
22:07:55 |
Webmama_Tina |
yup |
|
22:07:57 |
Webmama_Tina |
:) |
|
22:08:06 |
milk_maker |
wow, that went insanely fast... |
|
22:08:10 |
hathor |
Well, I think I hear my kids wanting me
to come listen to books for bed time |
|
22:08:20 |
Webmama_Tina |
let me just say THANKYOU to hathor for
another great chat! |
|
22:08:23 |
hathor |
we are early bedtime folks and |
|
22:08:44 |
Webmama_Tina |
and thank you to all of you for joining
us! |
|
22:08:45 |
hathor |
wanted to tell everyone that I'll be
here on the first Wed. next month too! |
|
22:08:48 |
Webmama_Tina |
Please join the Mommy Chats egroup at
http://groups.yahoo.com/group/mommychats
to receive notices about upcoming chats
and changes to Mommy Chats. |
|
22:09:05 |
vmarchant |
Thank-you! |
|
22:09:06 |
Webmama_Tina |
yup! we're so happy to have hathor as a
repeat guest! :) |
|
22:09:07 |
hathor |
Maybe we'll have a topic, get meaty with
it, whatcha think? |
|
22:09:15 |
vmarchant |
N.I.P.? |
|
22:09:16 |
Webmama_Tina |
lol, sounds good! |
|
22:09:19 |
hathor |
Love you guys thanks! |
