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18:58:04 |
attachedmama |
is this the ICAN chat? |
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19:00:30 |
attachedmama |
am I the only one here? |
|
19:04:46 |
claudia |
This is Claudia, from ICAN -
International Cesarean Awareness
Network. |
|
19:06:42 |
christymomof2 |
Hi Everyone! |
|
19:06:50 |
attachedmama |
oh good, I'm not alone! lol |
|
19:06:50 |
claudia |
Hi |
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19:06:59 |
christymomof2 |
Hi Claudia! How are you? |
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19:07:03 |
christymomof2 |
Hi Attached |
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19:07:08 |
claudia |
I am good, and you? |
|
19:07:12 |
christymomof2 |
Doing good thanks! |
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19:07:25 |
claudia |
How are things? |
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19:07:40 |
attachedmama |
Hello christy and claudia |
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19:07:55 |
claudia |
Hello A. |
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19:08:09 |
christymomof2 |
Pretty good, although Megan has stopped
sleeping through the night, and Noah
since graduating to a 'big boy' bed has
woken me up at least once every night |
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19:08:10 |
christymomof2 |
lol |
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19:08:34 |
attachedmama |
I'm new |
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19:08:37 |
claudia |
Tired? |
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19:08:45 |
christymomof2 |
how did you guess? LOL |
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19:08:51 |
christymomof2 |
Well welcome Attached! |
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19:08:56 |
christymomof2 |
How did you hear about ICAN? |
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19:08:56 |
claudia |
Attached, you are new? Do you have
questions? |
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19:09:22 |
claudia |
This is Claudia from ICAN, by the way. |
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19:09:26 |
attachedmama |
I heard about ICAN through my HBAC yahoo
group |
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19:09:41 |
christymomof2 |
LOL...I'm on HBAC, are you a new member
there? |
|
19:09:42 |
claudia |
Good. I had an HBAC too. |
|
19:09:44 |
LynnB |
Hi |
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19:09:54 |
claudia |
Hi Lynn. |
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19:09:55 |
attachedmama |
yeah I just joined a few days ago |
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19:09:59 |
attachedmama |
my name is Ashley |
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19:10:04 |
attachedmama |
if that helps |
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19:10:05 |
christymomof2 |
Hi Lynn! Is this Jeffrey Banauch"" |
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19:10:07 |
christymomof2 |
? |
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19:10:10 |
LynnB |
yes :) |
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19:10:13 |
christymomof2 |
I know I spelled it wrong |
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19:10:14 |
christymomof2 |
lol |
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19:10:16 |
LynnB |
Well Jeffrey is my dh, lol |
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19:10:23 |
claudia |
Hi Ashley. Are you planning an HBAC? |
|
19:10:24 |
LynnB |
almost right |
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19:10:41 |
christymomof2 |
that's okay...I have an odd last name
too. Never gets spelled right |
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19:10:53 |
christymomof2 |
Thanks for the info on the EWFM by the
way |
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19:10:59 |
LynnB |
Hmm, can't think of it, but I got the
Christy part LOL |
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19:11:10 |
LynnB |
Hi Claudia, Ashley |
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19:11:13 |
attachedmama |
I am not pregnant yet but plan to be in
a month or so, and yes I'm planning an
HBAC |
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19:11:16 |
christymomof2 |
it's Fiscer, but pronounced FisHer |
|
19:11:19 |
claudia |
What is EWFM? |
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19:11:21 |
LynnB |
aha |
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19:11:25 |
christymomof2 |
Egg white fertile mucous |
|
19:11:27 |
LynnB |
oh dear...lol |
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19:11:47 |
LynnB |
yes, we disussed our cervical mucous,
sigh |
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19:12:11 |
christymomof2 |
That's really exciting Ashley! |
|
19:12:13 |
LynnB |
Ashley - do you mind sharing what state
you're in? |
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19:12:25 |
christymomof2 |
Yes Claudia, lol....I may or may not
have had fertile mucous already |
|
19:12:37 |
attachedmama |
Ohio |
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19:12:37 |
christymomof2 |
and a day after a woops" in not using
anything as far as BC" |
|
19:12:42 |
claudia |
When were your cesareans, all? Mine was
1997. HBAC 2003. |
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19:12:56 |
attachedmama |
c-sec July 2005 |
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19:12:57 |
christymomof2 |
C-section 3-2004 |
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19:12:59 |
LynnB |
c/s '02, hbac '04 |
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19:13:05 |
christymomof2 |
HBAC 11-2005 |
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19:13:22 |
claudia |
All recent |
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19:13:36 |
LynnB |
Yes, it's sad, huh |
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19:13:43 |
claudia |
It never ends |
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19:13:56 |
attachedmama |
I wish I had been more educated about my
options when I was pregnant |
|
19:14:01 |
claudia |
The silly things that got me my
cesarean, still happen to friends of
mine |
|
19:14:01 |
LynnB |
Well I am in Kentucky my midwife has
done some births near Cinci |
|
19:14:05 |
christymomof2 |
And it seems like unless women are open
to a HBAC, the chance of VBAC right now
is slim and none |
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19:14:41 |
LynnB |
right, I felt that when I had to chose
where to birth. From the ICAN list, I
saw so many hospital births turn c/s,
even with the best laid plans |
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19:14:45 |
claudia |
My guess is that most cs moms want a
VBAC, but after multiple OB visits they
get worn down |
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19:14:55 |
christymomof2 |
Yep Lynn...exactly |
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19:15:01 |
christymomof2 |
We decided on a homebirth at 33 weeks |
|
19:15:04 |
christymomof2 |
I was sick of fighting |
|
19:15:05 |
LynnB |
It's too bad when you really don't have
a choice |
|
19:15:21 |
LynnB |
I was thrilled to vbac at home, but I
know not everyone wants to do that |
|
19:15:31 |
christymomof2 |
It is...but you know what? For me, it
ended the best possible way. I'll never
step foot in a hospital again for birth,
even if everything was supported"" |
|
19:15:34 |
LynnB |
Exactly Christy |
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19:15:42 |
attachedmama |
I was a little appaled when a friend of
mine had an elective c-sec for her
second |
|
19:15:56 |
LynnB |
Me too. I just want my BODY left alone,
please. sigh |
|
19:16:01 |
claudia |
I tried to change OBs, then tried a
birth center but finally I ended up
realizing that to get all my birth plan
wishes I needed to stay at home |
|
19:16:24 |
attachedmama |
can I ask some HBAC and/or midwife
questions? |
|
19:16:24 |
LynnB |
It's hard to watch someone CHOOSE a
section |
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19:16:25 |
christymomof2 |
Ashley...I have a friend really mad at
me right now because I've challenged her
choice to have yet another c/s even
though I showed her EVERY evidence of
her first not only being unnecessary,
but also unethical |
|
19:16:31 |
christymomof2 |
Sure Ashley! |
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19:16:55 |
attachedmama |
*nervous* |
|
19:17:06 |
christymomof2 |
about the question, or about the HBAC? |
|
19:17:12 |
claudia |
The success rate of VBAC in hospital is
very high 70-80 percent, but with
vaginal cesareans (episotomies, etc). Go
ahead Asheley. |
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19:17:13 |
attachedmama |
Umm, how did you choose a midwife? |
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19:17:28 |
claudia |
Interview, intervie, interview |
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19:17:36 |
christymomof2 |
I called around. I live in a very
set-apart place, where we only have 3
hospitals within an hour radius |
|
19:17:37 |
claudia |
Until you click with one |
|
19:17:43 |
christymomof2 |
There were only 3 that would come to my
town |
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19:17:51 |
christymomof2 |
1 was out of town my last 2 weeks of
pregnancy |
|
19:17:54 |
claudia |
Ask for references too |
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19:18:00 |
christymomof2 |
1 was too expensive, and too
intervention happy |
|
19:18:06 |
christymomof2 |
and the third was just perfect |
|
19:18:08 |
claudia |
Medwife? |
|
19:18:13 |
christymomof2 |
Sounded like it! |
|
19:18:29 |
christymomof2 |
She wanted to meet EVERY week, wanted
another u/s, allllll my previous
records, etc |
|
19:18:42 |
attachedmama |
do midwives do prenatal visits, just as
you would with an OB? |
|
19:18:42 |
christymomof2 |
she seemed too hands ON |
|
19:18:48 |
LynnB |
I was blessed to click with the first
one! |
|
19:18:49 |
christymomof2 |
Yes Ashley |
|
19:19:07 |
LynnB |
yes, it's lovely when they actually come
to your house for prenatals. I felt so
spoiled :P |
|
19:19:28 |
christymomof2 |
Mine checked heartrate each time, my
blood pressure, weight was up to me--I
opted to not weigh myself, and even
hemoglobin! |
|
19:19:36 |
claudia |
OB visits are 4 minutes, hoembirth
midwives around 1 hour |
|
19:19:47 |
claudia |
Very spoiled i felt |
|
19:19:52 |
christymomof2 |
She even palpated to see that Megan was
posterior |
|
19:19:54 |
christymomof2 |
little bugger |
|
19:20:10 |
claudia |
I am a doula, and OP babies make us work
hard |
|
19:20:13 |
christymomof2 |
OBs rely too much on technology instead
of relationship and listening |
|
19:20:14 |
attachedmama |
what was different about getting a birth
certificate? |
|
19:20:22 |
christymomof2 |
LOL Claudia...I'm becoming a Doula |
|
19:20:31 |
claudia |
Cool, Christy |
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19:20:33 |
christymomof2 |
Ashley...you have to have documentation
up the wazoo |
|
19:20:45 |
claudia |
Ashley, my midwife told me what to get |
|
19:20:46 |
christymomof2 |
I'm attending my first birth within the
next 2 weeks |
|
19:20:55 |
claudia |
Awesome, hospital I guess |
|
19:21:04 |
christymomof2 |
Yes, but it's a very crunchy" mama" |
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19:21:08 |
christymomof2 |
she wanted a homebirth, hubby said no |
|
19:21:19 |
claudia |
Hubby won? |
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19:21:20 |
christymomof2 |
so she want's me there to tell her NO |
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19:21:21 |
christymomof2 |
lol |
|
19:21:23 |
christymomof2 |
yes, he did |
|
19:21:32 |
claudia |
Must be good looking |
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19:21:39 |
christymomof2 |
She says he has a sense" about these
things, and didn't feel it was safe for
them" |
|
19:21:52 |
christymomof2 |
Hahaha....well, I don't go for his type,
but she loves him! |
|
19:22:06 |
christymomof2 |
Claudia, what do you do for OP moms? |
|
19:22:13 |
christymomof2 |
I didn't have a doula there, and my
labor was HELL |
|
19:22:35 |
attachedmama |
can I ask, how old are ya'lls children?
(sorry for sounding country, I'm
originally from Virginia) |
|
19:22:40 |
christymomof2 |
LOL! |
|
19:23:00 |
claudia |
My hands are on her back pushing, or I
am squeezing her hips. She has to be on
all fours. OP moms that is |
|
19:23:16 |
claudia |
Son 8, Daughter 2 |
|
19:23:21 |
christymomof2 |
Kaitlyn is 4 ( vaginal birth, augmented
and vacuum assisted ), Noah is 2 next
month ( c-section for suspected
macrosomia" ) and Megan is 14 weeks old
( wonderful HBAC )" |
|
19:23:41 |
claudia |
Lynn? |
|
19:23:44 |
christymomof2 |
Claudia, my midwife did double hip
squeeze at one point and it was
wonderful |
|
19:23:53 |
claudia |
Gotta love it |
|
19:23:56 |
christymomof2 |
But as far as pressure, my hubby tried,
and it hurt more |
|
19:23:58 |
christymomof2 |
poor guy |
|
19:24:02 |
christymomof2 |
I yelped when he tried |
|
19:24:03 |
christymomof2 |
lol |
|
19:24:26 |
LynnB |
Sorry, stepped away...kids! |
|
19:24:34 |
claudia |
Baby hard head on spine, ouch |
|
19:24:41 |
claudia |
Hi Lynn |
|
19:24:41 |
LynnB |
2 ds's - 3 and 1 |
|
19:24:50 |
attachedmama |
my son is 7 months |
|
19:25:12 |
attachedmama |
did any of ya'll feel sad or guilty
after you section? |
|
19:25:16 |
LynnB |
I am just now wondering why I didnt' try
all fours at my hbac |
|
19:25:18 |
claudia |
Most of us in ICAN of Edmonton have
cesarean sons and VBAC daughters |
|
19:25:26 |
LynnB |
oh yes, Ashley! |
|
19:25:34 |
LynnB |
bad first year :( |
|
19:25:35 |
christymomof2 |
Nope, not at first. Not until I found
ICAN and realized it was all unnecessary |
|
19:25:46 |
christymomof2 |
I thought my OB saved" me from a big
baby" |
|
19:25:55 |
attachedmama |
I still fell really guilty |
|
19:26:05 |
christymomof2 |
My HBAC baby was a full 2 lbs 2 oz
larger than my c-section baby ( He was
8.8, she was 10.10 ) |
|
19:26:08 |
LynnB |
yes, it's worse when you realize it
didnt' have to happen |
|
19:26:28 |
LynnB |
What do you feel guilty about? |
|
19:27:16 |
claudia |
All negative feelings...started in the
OR when OB ignored my questions about
the baby's sex. Mine was a failed
routine induction cesarean". Ultrasound
change due date from Aug 20 to Aug 5. Cs
happened Aug 14. I was ignorant." |
|
19:27:51 |
claudia |
I feel guilty about not knowing things |
|
19:27:52 |
christymomof2 |
I think *most* of our primary c-sections
were due to ignorance |
|
19:28:28 |
claudia |
My breastfeeding tragedy" lasted 29 days
and on day 30 he latched! That was my
saving grace." |
|
19:28:35 |
christymomof2 |
I was flat out STUPID to think that it
would be dangerous" to deliver my
son...who, by the way, was *showing* to
be only a little over 8 lbs by u/s also" |
|
19:28:39 |
christymomof2 |
Wow Claudia! |
|
19:28:46 |
attachedmama |
mine was also failed induction
(supposedly 12 overdue to thier
calculations, 2 over to mine) |
|
19:28:58 |
claudia |
Same as me, Ashley |
|
19:29:18 |
attachedmama |
i was in labor 36 hours |
|
19:29:42 |
claudia |
Me, 26 hours. I teach a class on
cesarean avoidance in Edmonton. I tell
women to avoid what happened to me. |
|
19:29:43 |
attachedmama |
and the dr came up and said you're fine
and the baby is fine, its just been too
long |
|
19:29:47 |
attachedmama |
so i agreed |
|
19:29:54 |
claudia |
How far dilated? |
|
19:29:55 |
christymomof2 |
oh wow |
|
19:30:03 |
LynnB |
I was also a failed induction. It is
hard to forgive yourself for not having
the knowledge to avoid a c/s. But it
isn't really a fair playing field |
|
19:30:05 |
attachedmama |
6 and 1/2 cm |
|
19:30:18 |
christymomof2 |
No it's not Lynn |
|
19:30:18 |
claudia |
I was 3 cm for 12 hours. |
|
19:30:22 |
LynnB |
I am really sorry, Ashley (((hug))) |
|
19:30:36 |
attachedmama |
i guess Simon was just NOT ready to come
out lol |
|
19:30:44 |
attachedmama |
thanks |
|
19:30:55 |
christymomof2 |
With Megan ( HBAC ) I had 3 weeks of
prodromal labor, 4 days of *actual*
labor, followed by 10 1/2 hours of
transition |
|
19:31:02 |
christymomof2 |
with a little over an hour of pushing |
|
19:31:09 |
christymomof2 |
NO OB would have let me go that long |
|
19:31:36 |
christymomof2 |
especially since I delivered her at
41w4days |
|
19:31:43 |
christymomof2 |
and she was 10lbs10oz |
|
19:31:54 |
christymomof2 |
I know for a fact I would have had
another c/s |
|
19:32:00 |
claudia |
My body was confused: pgel, pitocin,
morphine, demerol, epidural, bed rest at
3 cm for 12 hours. My VBAC was almost 2
days, would have been sectioned in any
hospital even though I was fine. |
|
19:32:11 |
christymomof2 |
Yep Claudia |
|
19:32:29 |
claudia |
Yahoo for you too |
|
19:32:34 |
LynnB |
Maya Angelou says that When you know
better, you do better"...it really is
true. Few of us realized how
knowledgeable we would have to become
about birth to advocate for ourselves!
But so many of us were able to make it
different the next time around!" |
|
19:32:43 |
attachedmama |
I think if they had just let Simon come
in his own time, none of it would've
happened |
|
19:32:59 |
LynnB |
Exactly what I think about my c/s baby
as well. |
|
19:33:01 |
christymomof2 |
Ashley, unfortunately, that's a truth
many of us have realized |
|
19:33:22 |
LynnB |
That's good that you know that. It helps
if you still believe your body was just
fine...just not given a chance |
|
19:33:32 |
claudia |
Patience would have done it for me too,
Ashley. HBAC moms become
mini-obstetricians, hee hee. |
|
19:33:41 |
christymomof2 |
LOL! |
|
19:33:44 |
attachedmama |
lol |
|
19:33:46 |
LynnB |
Many women feel broken - I am fortunate
that I knew I was just messed around
with too much |
|
19:33:57 |
christymomof2 |
Exactly. My friends now think I'm nuts
and tooooooo know it all" about
pregnancy and birth" |
|
19:34:29 |
claudia |
Quick, ask me for the cesarean rate in
Timbuktu...ha ha. I drive everyone up
the wall with my facts |
|
19:34:48 |
christymomof2 |
My friend that I spoke of before, she
had her primary c-section *before* labor
ever began, because they told her that
her son was TOO big to fit through her
pelvis |
|
19:34:53 |
LynnB |
yes, we are now the freaks, sad, huh? |
|
19:34:56 |
christymomof2 |
No labor, no pelvimetry exam |
|
19:35:01 |
christymomof2 |
Just TOLD her. |
|
19:35:11 |
claudia |
Shoe size? |
|
19:35:15 |
LynnB |
It is radical to question a doctor... |
|
19:35:20 |
claudia |
They asked my friend that |
|
19:35:21 |
LynnB |
esp. an OB! |
|
19:35:33 |
christymomof2 |
Now she's pregnant with #2, and I've
sent her every piece of information to
show her it's IMPOSSIBLE to diagnose CPD
before pushing |
|
19:35:50 |
christymomof2 |
and she STILL thinks the c/s was valid |
|
19:36:15 |
attachedmama |
I told my MIL that we'll be having an
HBAC for next baby, she looked me in the
eye and said You're nuts!".....which
isn't graet because I don't deal well
with critisicm" |
|
19:36:16 |
LynnB |
that's so frustrating Christy! |
|
19:36:18 |
christymomof2 |
Yep Lynn...that's for sure. LOL....I'm
trying desperately to talk my best
friend into at least a birth center
birth with her first child |
|
19:36:18 |
claudia |
My doula clients tell me about they past
cesareans, and it is CPD with FTP. Can't
have that! It is either raining or
snowing not both. |
|
19:36:36 |
christymomof2 |
Yep Claudia...exactly |
|
19:36:43 |
christymomof2 |
and nevermind that I don't believe in
either |
|
19:36:44 |
christymomof2 |
lol |
|
19:36:50 |
LynnB |
Oh, I know, Ashley. My MIL used to be an
L&D nurse! |
|
19:37:11 |
christymomof2 |
Ashley...my grandmother in law was a
nurse forever, and she told us we were
being dangerous |
|
19:37:14 |
LynnB |
It's sometimes better not to share your
plans, so that you don't have to deal
with the negativity |
|
19:37:34 |
christymomof2 |
Yep....LOL...I was ready to punch the
next person that asked is that safe?"" |
|
19:37:40 |
attachedmama |
Yeah, I'm starting to see that |
|
19:37:54 |
attachedmama |
but we do alot of unpopular" things, so
it's not new" |
|
19:37:59 |
christymomof2 |
And I'm now ready to scream when people
find out about my homebirth and say I'm
glad that was safe for you"" |
|
19:38:00 |
LynnB |
lol |
|
19:38:09 |
christymomof2 |
I'm going to start responding like that
when I hear of hospital births |
|
19:38:10 |
christymomof2 |
rofl |
|
19:38:27 |
claudia |
Lynn, Ashley and Christy...lovely to
chat with you. You seem to be doing okay
without me. Gotta run to do some more
ICAN Board work. (((Hugs))) |
